There was a time where I found myself stepping away from fiction. My home life had become extremely stressful over a period of several years and that had destroyed my concentration. Worse still, I was no longer sure who I was writing for. Friends were getting stories published left, right and centre. Other friends were getting hired into the industry as editors or agents or picking up publishing contracts. Several people whose work I first published at Hub are now four or five books into a healthy and richly deserved career.
And I’m not.
Jealousy was a factor but self-hatred was a much larger one. I hated that no matter how hard I worked it wasn’t enough. I hated that I didn’t have the brain space or the self-confidence and worse, that people could tell. I hated telling stories everyone told me were good but no one told me were good enough.
I hated writing. So I stopped.
Mur Lafferty, dear friend, genius and podcast pioneer likes to repeat a mantra; you’re allowed to quit. And you are. In fact in situations like the one I was in, it’s mandatory. Your mental and emotional health always, without fail, trumps whether or not you should be writing. Your brain is your instrument. Make sure it’s always in tune.
Oh and I sold a short story a few weeks ago.
And have a series of novellas planned for the next year.
You can quit any time. But you can always come back too.
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